(==>)
JOHN: or like, forget the eyepatch, we don't have to talk about the eyepatch.
JOHN: i feel as though my point still stands?
JOHN: there is basically a bottomless well full of stuff to go through.
JOHN: i mean we kind of glossed over it when you brought her up earlier, but what about yiffy?
JOHN: this might not come across so easily due to human troll cultural boundaries, but her existing is kind of a big deal??
JOHN: i feel like somehow i missed the part where we all sit around and talk about how strange it is that two of our friends went off and had a secret child without any of us knowing!
JOHN: is it too much to ask that we have that part now, karkat?
JOHN: i mean, maybe it just doesn't mean that much to you.
KARKAT: JOHN.
JOHN: which is a little strange, given that it ties in to the whole conflict that you had with jade and dave.
JOHN: oh god we have to talk about dave.
KARKAT: JOHN.
KARKAT: FUCKING HELL!
KARKAT: I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT DAVE.
JOHN: no, this is what i mean, karkat.
JOHN: we need to talk about dave!
KARKAT: HAHA! LIKE SHIT WE DO!!
KARKAT: I HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE HOW THIS IS EVEN A RELEVANT TOPIC OF CONVERSATION.
JOHN: oh come on.
JOHN: there's no way you aren't feeling kind of messed up about him, right?
JOHN: i know i am.
JOHN: whenever i think about how things ended between you two...
JOHN: especially now that he's...
JOHN: ugh, i'm sorry. i'm SO sorry karkat. sorry doesn't even begin to cover it.
JOHN: this whole thing feels so impossibly sad.
JOHN: all i'm trying to say is...
JOHN: it's not healthy to bottle these feelings up and not acknowledge them.
JOHN: even if you aren't feeling anything right now, and i don't for a moment believe that's true, *i* need to talk about dave!
JOHN: so can we please just talk about dave for a moment.
KARKAT: NNNNGNGNGGGGGGGUUUUUUGUUGHHHHHHHH FINE.
KARKAT: IF IT WILL GET YOU TO SHUT UP ABOUT THIS TOPIC FOR EVEN A BRIEF MOMENT, THEN FINE.
KARKAT: REGARDLESS OF HOW POINTLESS AN EXERCISE I CONSIDER IT TO BE, I WILL DISCUSS WITH YOU MY "FEELINGS" ABOUT DAVE.
JOHN: okay.
JOHN: thank you.
KARKAT: ARE YOU PREPARED TO BE INUNDATED WITH NONE OTHER THAN AN UNINTERRUPTED SPATE OF HARD, UNEMBELLISHED DATA VIS A VIS MY SWEEPS-SUPPRESSED, BISCUITFELT EMOTIONS ON THE DAVE SITUATION??
KARKAT: WELL HERE GOES.